It only seems like yesterday that the most important move was to the big bed

"We moved him into the big bed recently," I wrote. "His own pillow, own doona, covered in diggers and trucks and 'mmmbikes'. He looks so tiny in the bed that used to be his father's, surrounded by his teddies and the one girl he's taken a shine to, his sister's Jemima doll. Luckily the move's been a success."

He was still sleeping with a dummy, still climbing into my lap looking for a story, still happy to give me sloppy kisses and ask me to cuddle in next to him when I went to tuck him in for the final time.

"Oh how'd I love to sleep with my little boy, tucked safely in bed, away from the bear in the bear hunt, with your perfect little arm thrown across my neck. We'd sleep and find ourselves in some sort of Neverland where you'd never grow up.

"But you will. You'll be a man before I know it. Hopefully one who still holds a woman's hand and sleeps with your arm thrown across her neck. Just no sloppy kisses, OK?"

Well it's happened. Eighteen my boy, my Monster. Remember when you were called that in these columns? Probably not. It's been fabulous to stumble across the thousands of words I wrote about those early years. Memories all made real by words on a page.

You were both so little then. It was all so brand new. I thought every move, to the big bed, to daycare, to school, were the most important moves you'd ever make. How wrong I was. How wrong I was thinking that it was actually hard raising small children. Sure, it had its challenges, and I was tired, so tired. Sleep deprivation can do that to you. With hindsight I now tell young parents that it's actually pretty easy raising pre-teens. You wait until they hit puberty when they don't want to crawl into bed with you any more.

But he did the other day. All six foot and 100kg of him. I reached out and held his arm for a bit and I was thinking I hadn't had as big a bicep in my bed for ... well forever really ... without that being weird.

My baby boy is a man. And he has all the makings of being a fine young man. And that's not an easy thing to do in this day and age. An age where young men are guilty before they're proven innocent, an age where they're afraid to take the lead or take a chance, for fear of repercussions, an age where apparently none of them are asking for consent, where none of them are taking no for an answer.

I know it's not true. I know you and your mates are good men. I know that you truly do care for each other, and the young women who have come into your circle. You look out for each other. That's been a bonus, watching you grow up surrounded by boys I welcome into my home at any chance. I hope, no, I already know, that their parents feel the same way about you. That's one thing that's important in your life, filling it with good people. I love it that you tell me you're all quite happy to call each other out for poor behaviour. Keep doing that.

I love it that you indeed tell me all sorts of things. That we can still flop about on the couch and solve the problems of the world. I miss our car chats now that you're driving. Looking back at the columns, so many conversations were held while you and your sister were in the back seat. A literal captive audience. And when you both made that move into the front seat - see another move - the conversations became more real. As you learned how to formulate deeper questions, went looking for answers to all sorts of ideas, those conversations continued. While I implore you to actually look at people when they're talking to you, that's so very important, there are conversations best had looking straight ahead.

And that's where I'm looking now. Ahead at the big moves yet to come. At your birthday dinner the other night, your sister spied a newborn at the next table and got rather clucky. She was happy to admit she wanted a baby - just not any time soon - and that made my heart glow. She'll be a good mother, you'll be a good father too. Just both do a better job than we did. Isn't that what all parents want? You've both got all of those moves ahead of you. I wish you every success.

I guess the only thing I can do now is move aside. That's the hardest move of all.