Becoming a parent during a pandemic is tough - but I think becoming a grandparent during this time in our lives must be torture.
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I often wonder, what would be harder? Having a new grandchild right next door that you can't hold and can only see from a distance? Or having a newborn interstate or overseas, with no idea when you'll get to see them?
My parents had both. My brother and sister-in-law live on our family farm. At the start of COVID-19 last year, their beautiful baby boy was born.
Because of household visitor caps, it was weeks before they got to bury their faces in that blissful newborn smell.
My second daughter, Hope, was born in June - six days before Delta hit Sydney.
Mum and Dad and my husband's parents flew down from Queensland to meet her.
They had one week, before rushing home as COVID threatened to close state borders.
I'm so conscious of how much Hope has changed in the five months since. She babbles non-stop. She giggles in her sleep. She's recognising faces and voices.
They're moments and memories you'll never get back - as a parent and as a grandparent. And I know when we're reunited the grandparents will be beyond excited, but also there will be a sense of sadness over how much they've missed.
We Facetime almost every day.
All four grandparents spend hours 'gooing, gaaaring and grrring' through their iPads to Hope to get a smile. For my five-year-old daughter, Rose, she does craft and drawing with Ninna over Facetime.
She takes great delight when she spies my Dad in the background snoozing on the couch, knowing she can cry out "Wake up Arnie" and startle him.
She plays games, and puzzles with Nanna over video calls. And she loves shocking Pop with the latest thing she's learnt only to wait for his response, "Holy jumping bullfrogs!".
Their relationships haven't suffered because of the separation - they're as close as ever. But it's still tough.
Missing grandparents is hard on parents too - especially when you have a newborn.
I've felt it - yearning for familiar family company and that extra set of hands.
And I've referred countless friends with new babies to Gidget Foundation Australia for support - because having a baby is testing at the best of times, but having a baby during a pandemic is even more isolating.
New research by Gidget Foundation reveals 21 per cent of parents who have had a baby within the past two years report that their children's grandparents play a significant role in caring for them.
For these parents lockdowns and restrictions are not just an inconvenience but are actually putting so much extra strain and stress on their family.
For me, growing up, my favourite person was my grandmother - my Ninnie. She lived next door on the farm.
The greatest compliment I ever received as a little girl was when one of my grandmother's friends said I looked just like her - the same smile, gentleness and quietness.
In the years since, I've often put that down to the fact we spent so much time together. And I've felt sad that Rose hasn't had that with my Mum because we live so far away.
But in that first week that Hope was born, my most treasured memory was late one night at the hospital, with Rose and her Ninna and Nanna.
Rose was holding Hope. She'd decided she didn't like the name Hope - she was going to call her new baby sister Ruby. It was the type of strength, defiance, cheekiness and matter-of-fact-ness that my Mum - Ninna - has in spades.
Ninna of course was having none of it - and what followed was an argument between a five-year-old and a woman in her 60s over what this tiny baby should be called. Two personalities, two generations apart, living two states apart - but exactly the same, butting heads.
Under normal circumstances it would stress me out. Instead, it was the most comforting moment. I was like my Ninnie and Rose was just like her Ninna. Despite distance, despite COVID, Rose is just as close to her grandparents as I was to mine.
This December, our family isn't counting down to Christmas and Santa. We're counting down to Queensland reopening and seeing the grandparents.
This December, our family isn't counting down to Christmas and Santa. We're counting down to Queensland reopening and seeing the grandparents.
It's when Rose will get to do craft, drawing, puzzles and games in person with Ninna and Nanna. She'll actually jump on Arnie and wake him up. And the "Holy jumping bullfrogs" cry between Rose and Pop will be followed by a fit of tickles and cuddles. And as for Hope? Well, I'm pretty sure they'll hold onto her and not let her go, making up for six months of cuddles lost to the pandemic.
