This is a sample of The Echidna newsletter sent out each weekday morning. To sign up for FREE, go to theechidna.com.au
Subscribe now for unlimited access.
or signup to continue reading
Warning: this newsletter contains sarcasm, which some readers may find distressing.
The world breathed a sigh of relief when the Member for Cook secretly appointed himself Australia's foreign minister last week. Always helpful in a crisis, Scott Morrison turned up in Israel alongside Boris Johnson.
The selflessness. ScoMo and BoJo, giants on the international stage and paragons of credibility, took time out from their frantic schedules addressing conservative echo chambers to pose for photos in the rubble of a Hamas atrocity site and offer sage advice: basically, keep shooting and don't listen to people telling you to pause for humanitarian reasons.
The self-control. All the cameras turned in his direction and not one smirk from the former PM. How his face must have hurt.
The courage. You have no idea how scary it is to don a flak jacket when missiles and bombs are raining down on refugee camps, schools and hospitals mere kilometres away.
I know what you cynics are thinking.
That this was a desperate search for relevance. A tasteless bout of grandstanding in which nothing Scotty says matters a jot when actual world leaders, not discredited backbenchers or junked British PMs, are flying back and forth desperately trying to de-escalate the conflict.
A photo-op that might help secure a speaking gig at the next gathering of nutters who think climate change is crap, multiculturalism is evil and colonialism should be applauded for its running water and flushing toilets.
A transparent bid to woo back voters who deserted the Liberals in Wentworth and Goldstein and turned blue ribbon seats teal.
You're all missing the point.
In the finest Aussie tradition, Scotty is standing up for his mate, Bibi Netanyahu, just as he's always done. Have you all forgotten our former PM's inspired decision to move Australia's embassy to Jerusalem? How that sure-fire way to promote peace in the Middle East was scuppered when the nasty Labor government was voted in last year?
Little wonder they're mates. They have much in common and know what it's like to be scapegoats.
Scotty: Robodebt? "Not my fault."
Bibi: Utter failure to predict the Hamas attack? "The generals' fault."
And they both know what it's like to be deeply unpopular.
There was a stink about Netanyahu well before Hamas unleashed its barbarism on October 7. Israel saw the biggest protests in its history when the Israeli PM pressed ahead with plans to weaken the judicial system. Day after day, Israelis massed in the streets to oppose the move. They're massing again, this time because they've lost confidence that Bibi is capable of leading them out of this tragedy. Less than 30 per cent of Israelis believe he can, polls say. Most want him gone.
When faced with thousands of March 4 Justice protesters in March 2021, Scotty chose not to leave the parliamentary bunker. "Not far from here, such marches, even now are being met with bullets, but not here in this country," he told the House of Representatives.
And, then as now, poor Scotty was deeply misunderstood. An entire gender decided they could no longer vote for him.
We need to cut him some slack. He appoints himself to these positions of power and influence - even, miraculously, from the lonely outpost of the nosebleed section of the opposition backbench where he's kept cruelly out of sight - with noble intent.
And we should not be surprised when after his good friend Bibi is frogmarched out of the Knesset, Scotty steps up and appoints himself prime minister of Israel. He's that sort of bloke.
HAVE YOUR SAY: Were you surprised to see Scott Morrison turn up in Israel? Should he have left any commentary to our actual Foreign Minister, Penny Wong? Were his intentions noble or self-serving? Email us: echidna@theechidna.com.au
SHARE THE LOVE: If you enjoy The Echidna, forward it to a friend so they can sign up, too.
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:
- The federal government hopes Centrelink call wait times will reduce with 3000 extra staff to be recruited in frontline roles. The staff will be employed across the country with about 500 workers to be employed in Canberra. Staff will be employed in capitals as well as regional centres including Port Macquarie, Coffs Harbour, Toowoomba and Ballarat.
- Support for Labor and Prime Minister Anthony Albanese's approval rating have both fallen sharply in the first Newspoll conducted since the Voice to Parliament referendum defeat. The coalition leads Labor on the primary vote, 37 per cent to 35 per cent, according to the poll published in the Australian on Monday. On a two-party preferred basis, Labor leads the coalition 52 per cent to 48 per cent - its weakest result since it won government in 2022.
- Multiple federal infrastructure projects are on the chopping block in a bid to ease inflation, with a review finding billions of dollars worth of overruns. An independent review of the infrastructure investment program has found $33 billion of budget blowouts, with that figure tipped to grow even further.
THEY SAID IT: "To say nothing, especially when speaking, is half the art of diplomacy." - Will Durant
YOU SAID IT: Next Monday is World Kindness Day but why wait to make someone's day, not least your own.
Glenn writes: "Kindness isn't too hard. I think for many the paying attention and realising where kindness is needed is more of an issue."
"I cannot count the number of kindnesses that I have been shown over my 60-something years," writes Margie. "One of mine was when on the XPT from Taree to Sydney, a young lady had her handbag stolen. Staff were amazing, gave her food and tea without payment, were helping as they could. She had no money or phone and was pretty upset. I gave her $100. She tried hard to refuse but I said, 'Please take it - if you were my daughter heading to Sydney without money - I would want you to have this. You'll need it.' She wanted to pay me back but I refused, suggested she pass it on one day. You are right John, the real pleasure was all mine."
Paul writes: "Thanks, John, for your helpful and timely reminder. You're absolutely right about the benefit to the giver, not just the receiver. Someone famous once said we should love others as we love ourselves. Great encouragement for social cohesion, but he also said we should love our enemies. Now that's a really tough gig!"
Alan from north west Tasmania recalls kindness he received: "I was in Woolworths shopping when I suddenly realised I didn't have enough money to pay for my groceries. I was $10 short so I said I would return the items. Suddenly a kind lady said she would pay for the items. I turned around and thanked her. It proves there are kind people in this world."
Jillian writes: "A story along the lines of your father-in-law and the Russians: we were in Dalgety, on the Snowy River, having dinner at the pub. My husband went to the bar and encountered a couple trying to order dinner. My husband came to the rescue when he realised they were French with no English, announcing 'My wife can speak French.' A hush through the bar as I recalled my uni French from decades before. Meals ordered and consumed. We then sat together for a chat of sorts. Offered to take them for a bush-bash the next afternoon. Returning to the pub for a drink, we exchanged emails. We have since visited and stayed with them in France twice."
"Just the other day, I walked out of the local Coles," writes Samantha. "Ahead of me was a very elderly man struggling with his groceries. I am ashamed to admit that my first thought was to get around him as quickly as possible so I did not get stuck behind him. In my defence, I had no trolley and full hands. It was so nice to hear the person behind me offer their help. I imagine that it would have made him happy."
Kaye writes: "Loved your kindness epistle. It is totally true. I am the recipient of many kindnesses from strangers. And a prolific giver of kindnesses."
"Thank you, John, for your words about kindness," writes Sue. "I relief teach in an area with lots of difficulties. I find that a smile, a friendly greeting, looking pleased to see each student pays enormous dividends. It took three years to get one student to do more than give a slight dip of the head in acknowledgment, but by the fourth year, he was giving me a small smile in return and by the end of that year said, 'Hello' in response. As I get older and my arthritis worse, I have slowed down. I look more fragile than I am and get lots of gestures of kindness when I do the shopping. I sometimes feel a bit of a fraud but I do appreciate the offers of assistance and particularly enjoy that there are people out there who keep an eye out for those who need a bit of a hand. Thank you to all of you. You are making the world just that bit better for lots of people."