Police say the actions are hard to comprehend, but they see them all too often

But it shocked the Canberra community.

The remanded detainees were all under strict conditions from the court not to contact their traumatised victims.

The jail's call logs were being monitored and all conversations from inside the prison were being recorded.

However, the alleged offenders either didn't care, or their need to assert control over their victims had overwhelmed any reasoning.

Or both.

One of the alleged perpetrators was on remand for previous, serious family and sexual violence offences. He had contravened previous orders issued by the court - orders which if breached would have him immediately re-arrested - 10 times.

Even public "naming and shaming" is rendered ineffective when serious, habitual offenders can't be named by the court in order to protect the victim's identity.

To police officers like Inspector David Williams and Senior Constable Caleb Boxx, who work in the ACT's Family Violence and Vulnerable Persons Unit, instances like these - even as extreme as these - are examples of how the compulsive need for coercive control was such a significant factor in the perpetration of family violence.

In the ACT, 18 per cent of family violence offenders are recidivists, locked in the cycle of repeated offending. The Christmas-New Year period is usually one of the worst for family violence and the most recent holiday period was no different, when ACT police attended more than 100 family violence matters and arrested 22 people.

In 2023, police in the ACT attended 20 per cent more family violence incidents than the year before. There were 3209 offences reported. Family violence assaults increased by 9 per cent, and the number of offenders arrested increased from 764 to 844.

"Most people out there, living within normal, loving relationships, would be really, genuinely shocked if they knew the extent, the extreme levels to which family violence offenders go to assert control over their victims," Inspector Williams said.

"Some of these men just can't help themselves; their need to dominate their victims, in many cases subjugate their victims by so many different means - psychologically, physically, emotionally, financially - just over-rides everything else.

"It's an overwhelming compulsion."

Senior Constable Boxx offered the appalling example of how one offender texted his female victim an unbelievable 1300 times in a single day.

"She [the victim] had a protection order against this bloke, didn't want anything to do with him," he said

"She had left him, cut off all ties with him, moved into a new apartment on the other side of town, tried to build a new life away from this bloke.

"But he was just totally obsessed. He tracked her down.

"He even climbed up to her apartment balcony and took photographs on his phone of her and then made threats of violence against her.

"It's hard for people out there in the community to comprehend this level of obsession. But we see it. And we see it all too often."

Then, when the frustration of the obsessed offender reaches the most extreme levels, there's the terrible violence.

Perhaps the most shocking example of this in the ACT was the brutal 2015 death of Tara Costigan at hands of the odious Marcus Rappel, who murdered her with with an axe one day after she had taken a domestic violence order against him. She was cradling their week-old baby in her arms when she was attacked in her Calwell home.

The story of Rosie Batty, the 2015 Australian of the Year for her strident campaigning against family violence, would be familiar to many. Her book, A Mother's Story, should be required reading for anyone seeking to understand how family violence extracts such a terrible toll on its victims.

In Ms Batty's case, as many know, it resulted in the stabbing death of her 11-year-old son, Luke, at the hands of his father.

Luke Batty had been out in public, at cricket practice. An intervention order had been issued preventing the father contacting the family or being anywhere near them. But that was ignored by the offender, who set out to extract his own terrible vengeance.

For those such as the police and others working in the challenging family crisis intervention space, the warning signs are often clear.

But it's not always apparent to the victims. Or if they are, there appears no escape route.

"Sadly, some victims that we speak to feel like it's their fault; they feel a shame or humiliation in reporting it; and while I think that perceived stigma is less now that it once was, nonetheless, it's still there," Inspector Williams said.

"And for other victims, the act of severing a relationship is so hugely complicated; they think they can't just get up and leave. There might be kids involved and significant financial dependence.

"Sometimes even the victim's mobile phone doesn't belong to them so they can be cut off and are completely without a network or a means to contact anyone."

When the compulsive perpetrator is denied his chosen control mechanism, the need to do so invariably escalates; sometimes slowly, and other times very quickly. Or, as in some cases, is diverted to another victim.

Dr Tulika Saxena, the director for the prevention of domestic violence at the YWCA in Canberra, said that coercive controlling behaviour often starts with one partner monitoring another very closely. This micro-regulation includes the places they can go, the people they can talk to, and checking their texts and phone use. This is when victims begin to feel isolated and trapped.

"This is a very strong signal in a relationship that things are not right and it's time to seek help," she said.

"There may not be a threat or act of physical violence at first. Often it starts with threats of consequences and repercussions if the other person does not comply. And these types of behaviour may gradually become more and more intimidating and controlling."

She said the critical time and when violence most often emerges was when the woman threatens to leave the relationship or takes out a court order against the other. This often is the trigger point, and when women in crisis desperately need protection and the help of police.

Inspector Williams said, "We, as police, are offender focused; our first priority is to make these people accountable for their actions because by arresting them, that withdraws them from a situation where they can potentially inflict harm.

"But equally - and this where that shared responsibility with support services is so important - we want to influence and change behaviour over the longer term so that we don't have these cycles repeated.

"That's why so many offenders who breach their orders are put before the courts and why we came out so publicly on those FV breaches from within the jail.

"The victims must be protected. But the police can only do so much. As a society, we need to identify the signs early or at the very least, ensure that victims know when they are in a potentially dangerous relationship and how to reach out."

The NSW government passed an amendment to its legislation in late 2022 which imposes a penalty of up to seven years imprisonment for coercive control. The ACT government has no specific legislation, although it is of the view that these types of crimes are already covered by the territory's Family Violence Act.

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